SNOUTWOOD1:26 P.M.
BEAGLE ENGAGES UNPLUGGED VACUUM IN MULTI-HOUR STANDOFF, NEITHER SIDE BLINKS
The vacuum, which was off, switched off, and had been off for two days, was described by the dog as 'still a threat.'
The National Dogs Desk
National Dogs
Coast-to-coast coverage of counter-surfing, vacuum diplomacy, and a nation that still does not understand the stairs.
HOUNDSTOOTH5:33 P.M.
LABRADOR NAMED PRIME SUSPECT IN DISAPPEARANCE OF ENTIRE ROTISSERIE CHICKEN
Only evidence recovered at the scene was a single grease spot and an expression of profound innocence.
FETCHBURG3:48 P.M.
DOG BURIES SINGLE BISCUIT IN SOFA CUSHIONS, FORGETS LOCATION IMMEDIATELY
Elaborate concealment operation completed in full view of the household; suspect began searching for the biscuit four minutes later.
BARKERSFIELD8:09 A.M.
NATION'S GOLDEN RETRIEVER STILL DOES NOT UNDERSTAND STAIRS, EXPERTS BAFFLED
Subject has used the same staircase daily for four years and continues to approach it like a new and hostile invention.
Other desks
The Morning Edition